You can leave a few footprints here and there and leave the map trailed down my back and leave diamonds in the floorboards of all your secrets but you can never make me forget how I feel how I felt how I’m feeling with you. I’ve counted every step and every left turn and every exit ramp and all that they add up to is too far away. 

I’m flat out scared. I’m not afraid to admit it, I’m just afraid to accept it. I’m scared of tomorrow morning and tuesday nights and the last day of the month. I find myself dug deep into a routine I’ve hated since I took the first step. And I’m alright because it means I don’t have to worry. I don’t have to change my mind.

I keep promises and plans like keys in my back pocket and soon enough they weigh me down like anchors. They don’t unlock anything and they don’t let me go. You can hear them for miles and miles but no one seems to recognize the sound of the world caving in. Soon enough my entire head is going to cave in. 

And then I think if all the iron in the world could drown me so quickly, why am I still here?

It’s so hard to run with the world on my shoulders.